Twerlyn's Way of Thinking

It’s about 3am right now and I’m wide awake, guess why? The baby woke up for milk and she got back to sleep after drinking few ounces. She hardly napped yesterday for the reason that I didn’t turn on her favorite classical music in the tone of epiphone junior. I only play it at night when she is in her crib. Really, thanks to classic songs that I have in my collection, it helps me a lot to put her to sleep. Once she hears it, she would immediately fall asleep even if the songs are played repeatedly.

That’s one thing I like about her not taking naps on the day time ‘coz when dark times comes she is asleep through the night, although I have to wake up once for milk. As early as 9pm, I’m dead tired too because she worn me out by playing with her the whole day. I would rather play with her than carrying her the entire time. She just had a power nap and that gave me a little time to do chores at home.

My friend invited me yesterday to go up in the mountain because the snow was pouring and so the kids could play. I didn’t confirm right away if I could join them because of two reasons : I have to wait for my husband if he’s available on Sunday; and I don’t have winter boots or should I say snow boots. Anyway, I didn’t go out for that day. Maybe some other time I could see snow once again.

I’m thinking to get a dual purpose boots, it’s english riding boots to keep me warm if ever I ended up going to the mountain before spring comes. I wish the snow would continue to pour until February. The mountain is just 45mins drive from home. It’s closer than Big Bear City ( my first time snow encounter, 2 years ago).

I’m back once again to update my blog. Lately, I was thinking of giving up blogging because of the last payment I got, very little! And I said to myself if the next payout is still be the same, then I’m done. And bum I got a bunch of assignments, yiy! This means I have to continue blogging ( for money) , the only reason why you still see me here alive. Yeah, that is the only reason. I have to be truthful that I don’t go blog-hopping anymore. I only update when I have assignments. I still like to write because of the same reason. BUT when I start a regular job that I like, then I’ll stop blogging. Maybe in 3 years from now. Mommy, come over here in California, watch my kids please, LOL!

Yeah, I still have my part-time job, our business is still alive and kicking ( Thank you Lord)! Well, it’s tax time again pretty soon, that means I’m busy again doing the quick book thingy and after that, tax refund! Yiy ! Have a good day everyone!

Could you sleep straight at night if the mattress is kinda soft or hard or should I say a mattress that is not comfortable to sleep with? Well, if you ask me the same question, I could still sleep as long as I’m sleepy I don’t care. I could even sleep in the wood! Too bad my husband couldn’t sleep well if the mattress is not good.I think we need a number bed pretty soon and purchase it at mattress los angeles. I heard that they have a pretty good selection with high quality product.

I noticed lately when I woke up in the morning I’m all alone by myself. Where was he then? Well, he was down stairs sleeping on the couch like a baby. That’s how bad our mattress is, but for me its find. I don’t notice the difference. Oh well, I need my husband next to me through the night.. wink.. wink! Alright , let’s get a new mattress.

The 6-week vacation is over. I can’t wait for Monday. I can’t wait to see my husband wearing his nursing uniforms for the first time. Being a student-nurse is not so cool. The pressure is all over his system now because he knows that nursing is not an easy course to take. A little over a year from and he’s done. Wishing that he could get a job right away.

As the moment he’ll get back to school then my life is not gonna be the same again. I mean I’ll be a handful again with the baby and Arianna by my sight. Oh well, I love having them. Just hope that I don’t get stressed. We’ll see.

I was busy yesterday ( the last day of 2011) and today the first day of 2012. It is pretty obvious why I’m busy. I cleaned and organized the house. I believe that’s the best thing to do for the last and first day of the year. My mind is cleared up at the end of the day and I could say that for the next 12 months, the house is organized. What a wishful thinking huh?

The first part I cleaned was the higher area such as windows and shelves. The last part I cleaned was obviously the floors such as the carpet, the tiles, and the llaminate floor. I rested as well in the middle of my clean-up day. The family went to the park because it was a perfect day to go out. What a wonderful day to begin the new year.

The official title of the house and lot in the Philippines is in my hand now, under my care. It’s only 450 sq. meters , just enough to build a decent size swimming pool at the backyard. But before that I have to think and plan about the size of the house. It is newly renovated though but I’m not contented with the size. I want wider and have more space to move, an open floor plan. Oh well it’s time to save money to buy a swimming pool pump and to  start painting the house and fence the property. I can’t wait to visit the country.

I hope my dream about having a swimming pool would come true. To dream is free so I will not stop dreaming.

What’s your reason why you keep your photos and videos in a safe place? For me, they are important files to keep. They bring back good memories from the past and that’s my way to cherish the moment I had in every simple occasion. 

Today, I organized my photos to its respective album and  I sorted my video clips. To download videos and photos is just easy to do, it took me several minutes. Now that I have it in a safe place, my mind is now clear and not to worry if I accidentally delete them. Having copies in different places is also a good idea just in case one of them is misplaced.

I know I’m way too late to thank my phone. I should have tried blogging using this phone the moment I acquired this last Oct 14 of this year. Really, I could blog without delay, I didn’t know I could. I under estimated the power of 4s. I thought I could only do Facebook and check my emails, or browse the Internet. Oh well, I can blog using this phone now. But I could only post free articles, not the paid ones hehe! There’s no link to post the HTML code, bummer! And I can’t justify the post either. At least, I can write personal posts . I might update my blogs when I have a moment.

There are times that I would like to stop blogging because I don’t really have that much time to face the desktop or mini laptop to update my online diary. Especially now that I have new baby who is so easy to deal as of these days, and two other kids who are in school and active on other extra activities. Dropping them off to school and picking them up are pretty much my main responsibility this year and years to come. My life now is more flexible compared before that I just stayed at home and did the stuffs that need to be done such as blogging and household chores. With regards to kids’ extra activities, I’ve learned to drive faster than the limit speed in order not to be late. The time schedule between the activities are pretty much close so no chance to follow the limit. But I’m thankful that we are always safe and sound going to our destination and arriving home without a problem.

So me direct you the point why I’m still blogging inspite me being busy at all times. Well, there are only two reasons: First, blogging is already part of my passion for almost five years now and letting go is what I can’t do. This is like FB to me. It’s hard to resist. Although, I’m not active in blogging, still I’m here once in a while . But sad to say I can’t do roaming around to drop comments to others. That is why, it is better for me if no bloggers would pay attention to my blogs because I’m guilty when I can’t return the favor. Second reason, the opportunities I receive from Triangle Direct  each week is also hard to resist. I have to write my assignments and earn from them. This company  never fail to provide work to bloggers from all over the world.

My eldest daughter new passion is playing a piano. This is not actually new to her because couple years ago, she was playing piano, just that she stopped and now she’s back. I asked her if she also likes to learn how to play guitar since the chords are just the same with the piano. She said yes and she actually day dreaming that she’s playing a piano while singing. I told her that when we get back to the Philippines for a vacation, I’ll buy her a guitar so she could play and sing with electric guitar songs.

Her recital is coming up this December and I couldn’t wait to share with you all her talent. I’m glad that she’s no longer afraid to play in front of the audience. The reason why she stopped playing piano was she’s afraid that people are staring at her while playing.

My 3rd labor experience was pretty easy at first. I was so excited to give birth because I really thought that I could get an epidural shots when I reached the 4cm or if I couldn’t tolerate the pain anymore. I have interviewed so many co-filipinas here in the US who have undergone delivery here . They all  said that the epidural were given when they already on 4cm opening . I said oh well I shouldn’t be scared then when I face active labor. If you continue reading, you’ll realize how mean and pathetic  that full-blooded Filipina OG-GYN who handled my case. You might think, wait a minute why I chose a Filipina Doctor. Why not an American. Well, of course I love my Filipinas. I really thought all Filipinas have the same hearts  as mine ( compassionate, loving, and caring) LOL… I was totally wrong. Now, I’m convinced that everyone is different. I don’t know why I always believe that all  Filipinas are great, no matter how many of them have put me down. I’m still in the denial stage haha! I always want all Filipinas to be great. Is it really hard to be good? Why? What’s the matter of these people?

Back to my labor story. There were two Filipina OBGYN who have seen me for my regular pregnancy check-up, most especially during the last two months. I searched for them, I longed for them ( Filipina Doctors), they are friends working in the same clinic, located next to the world class Hospital where I gave birth. One of the doctors (Filipina) was really sweet and I want her to handle me but she said it depends who will be the “on-call-doctor “  on the big day. But unfortunately, it was the other Filipina OBGYN. During the regular check-up, this doctor was pretty good to me, but she didn’t talk to me in our native language. She’s on her late 30′s or early 40′s, pretty young huh? Talks really fast and always telling me to go the hospital when the pain is about 8 out of 10 or if the interval is every 5mins . The labor day came, and I went to the clinic for my final check-up. The sweet OB, the one that I like said I’m already 4CM and she advised me to go the hospital for delivery. I asked her who will be the on-call-OB, and she said the other one, her friend. I told her well, can I go to the hospital later because I can still tolerate the pain. She said okay as long as I’m just around close to the hospital. BUT her friend, the other OBGYN who have handled my case was giving me different instruction! It was 1:30PM when the sweet OB told me to go and be admitted in the labor room. But I went to the emergency room at 5:30PM , at that time, I’m already in severe pain. Remember that mean Filipina OB said I have to go the hospital when it’s 8 out of 10 as the most painful. Well, I followed her advise since she’ll be the one to handle my case. The labor interval was every 5 minutes , sometimes 2 minutes. It was like that when I arrived in the hospital. Then after one hour it was roughly 10 as painful is concerned. The nurse has to call the OB-0n-call for an epidural shots, it needs approval from the OB first before they could give me the painless shot. I was roughly 5cm and I couldn’t tolerate the pain, no more. My smiles were gone and my tears almost fell. And so the nurse called my Filipina OB about the situation, and this co-filipina told the nurse to tell me “To GO Home” and have my labor at home. My reaction , just in my mind, was .. ” Is she f–king kidding me?!”I’m in severe pain, I could hardly walk because of the labor pain, and she’ll just say “to go home”, punyeta cia! ..The nurse said , sorry dear, your Filipina OB wanted you to go home.  What is the matter of this Filipina? The nurse felt sorry about my situation because she could tell and see how painful the labor I have at that moment. She called the OB again and told her that I’m not going anywhere, I insisted to stay for my own good. And again, the OB said that I have to go home.. she even said that it is my 3rd child and I have known it better. Yeah right this is my 3rd labor, my 3rd child and yeah I already know when is the right time to push or give birth… And I f–king need that epidural NOW! I knew that in few hours I’m  ready to PUSH. And yeah, I was right! I’m closed to give birth. On the 4th call, the Filipina OB finally said yes to epidural. I suffered 4 hours of severe pain from active labor, it was traumatic. I couldn’t believe there’s a Filipina OB here in the US who’s horrible as she can be. I asked other patient of hers and the source said that majority of her cases were Cesarian Section (CS) 99% CS cases. I concluded, that she just want huge money from CS surgeries. Oh well, if normal delivery is not as huge money that she could get, sorry doctor because I could push a 10 pound baby out from my  beautiful vagina! LOL!My baby was 8.3 pounds.

That OB entered the delivery room without smile from her face, no moral support from her mouth, and a total toxic to my eyes. I didn’t care “whatever” her reactions at that time. The OB stayed in the delivery room for only 30 minutes total,  she needs to get out from my sight right away, or else she might get some harsh words from me, LOL! I pushed 4 times and my healthy baby came out. The nurses were so great to me and so I gave my sweet smile all the time in the delivery room, even when the OB arrived , I still smiled. No more pain, thanks to epidural, I had it for one hour and a half. I still have the time to thank the OB after the delivery. I forgot what she have done to me earlier. I forgave her already. But there is one thing for sure, no more Filipina OB for me , especially a Filipina who hates to speak the native language. I’m  not against a Filipina who speaks American English fluently, but if you are talking to me, could you please speak in tagalog or bisaya? Because no matter how great you are in “speaking  in dollars,” I don’t buy you…but instead you are just one of those stinky fishes around the corner.This is an off topic but let me just point out that if you are Filipina who lived in the Philippines ( and moved to US) and know how to speak the  Filipino dialect, you should use that dialect if you are talking to your co-Filipino. Kababayan what’s happening with you? Sorry if I offended you, but I guess you better start speak in Tagalog when talking to me. I heard you once ( in Tagalog), LOL!

If ever I’ll get pregnant again, I don’t bother if the OB is a guy. What matter most to me  is to have that stinkin’ epidural at the moment I have my first severe pain during labor.